My Father's Day Abecedarius

My Dad, circa 1974, Avalon NJ

Yesterday I spent an hour in the local card shop and walked out with nothing. I was looking for a Father's Day Card and the selection seemed to suggest that most fathers are defined by drinking, mowing lawns, grilling, fishing, golfing or some combination thereof. None of them captured the essence of my father. This isn't altogether Hallmark's fault; my father is a complicated man. A history of depression and anxiety has left him emotionally disconnected from family, friends, and his former self. It's a difficult task to find the card that expresses Father's Day from that perspective. Instead, I hold on to the everlasting influences and gifts he gave me throughout his time as my healthier father. Watching a loved one's mental health decline is like watching a photograph progressively fade. The shadow of memory remains even when the photograph has lost all color and definition. Still, the imprint remains in your mind's heart.

What my father instilled in me was a love of literature, the arts, music, and mostly food and wine. So this year, instead of a card, I give him an abc recount of all the specifics. Dad, with much gratitude, I thank you for. . .

Abalone in Monterey, apricots in Sunnyvale, Avalon beach

B usch's for seafood in the summertime

C recco's in the 'Burg, antipasto

Donuts we made, shaken in a paper bag with powdered sugar

Ernie's French Onion soup on our first trip to San Francisco

Fort Ord Army Base and Farley's for books

G atch, Lee mesmerizing painting in your closet

Hemingway and Hammett

Ipswich Clam Strips at Buddy William's on Fridays

Johnny Cash, the albums, the concert at the Allentown Fair

K istler Chardonna y and Kruggerands

Louis Roederer Cristal, L'Orangerie, Lutece